Saturday, February 8, 2014

Choices of love

Why have mix emotions? What are they good for? Why does it always happens?

These are the questions I think about when things goes wrong for me when I’m in a relationship or when an ex tries to come back into my life. The longest relationship I've ever been in was three years but within those three years a lot has happen. But unlike any other relationship they have their ups and downs, and sometimes it’s a huge curve that turns into a wave and never wants to stay a straight line. But within those three years I have experience a lot. I have experience what any man or woman would have experience in their past or present relationships, and that would be cheated on, being call bad names, being push away, getting yelled at for no reason, having arguments, not getting any support, being put down, and any other bad experience that can create a deep scare. A deep scare that well allow you not to have any self-confidence, being yourself around others, and having a hard time to trust someone (not matter how hard you tried). And then there are the good times when you feel loved or cared for but sometimes that can only last for a little bit and it well go out, even when you try to fix it. But for others that fix their relationship and everything is better than ever you and your significant other, are the luckiest. And for the people that got that faithful love-able person you are lucky to experience the gift of love and passion.

Then you have those moments when someone comes along and your ex comes in at the same time, and you end up fighting your feelings and making a big choice. But making that choice is something that you have to think about and it takes up a lot of your time. When I had to think about choosing between two people, I think about the ex-past history between me and him. Thinking about the history between me and my ex weren't so happy because we are so far apart because of school, repeated arguments, and too many chances I have given because I was scared to be alone. Then there were times that I felt like yelling as loud as I can or go for a long drive, but I realized that I am only human and nothing can change that. Things maybe rough but I have to go through this big challenge that has come up into my life. But now that I have grown up more I have made a choice on starting fresh and new because, from my point of view if there were too many break ups, arguments, stress, worried, and others bad things that have happen in the past, then it is time for you to move on even if it hurts. Moving on well not be easy but it’s a start, a brand new start to fixing yourself back up and rebuilding that confidence that makes you, YOU. It took me three years to figure this all out, I had my parents and friends telling me that I could do better and I should be with someone who is caring, faithful, shows respect, and now that I see what they were talking about I am able to understand because I’m tired of getting hurt in so many ways and now that I am moving forward, I’m rebuild my temple inside and out so I can be happy with my self and accept the person who I created.

In the end we all hope that we find our other half. But I hope that everyone finds love and hope, but if it pushes you back down, get back up and have faith in yourself because you are unique and you are beautiful or handsome. You have a lot of opportunities in your life that are happening, so take advantage of it while you’re here, don’t go out and rush things and hope for the best.

After all the questioning to myself about my past and present choices, I have figure out my own answers. So why have mix emotions, why they are good, and why does it happen…


Having mix emotions is something that tells you that you have a heart, a heart that wants to be treated good or bad but it is up to you to make that big choice on what you desire the most in life. And why is it good to have mix emotions, it is good because it’s an experience that you have gain and you are more aware on what’s going on in the next relationship and sometimes it is good to know what are mix emotions are so you can help a friend or someone close. It happens for a reason, a reason for it to happen or not happen, if the person is right for you or not. 

"The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched - they must be felt with the heart."
-Helen Kele

Thursday, February 6, 2014

Related or Not

Navajo Culture
Yaateeh shikis (Hello my friends),

Well today I thought I would talk a little bit about my culture, and as a Native American I am proud to say that my tribe is Navajo (Dine). In my culture we have 4 clans, and within those 4 clans I can tell who is related to me and who is not. Having four clans allows me to find out who is related to me (it is like finding your extended family, that you didn’t know you have), and by just those 4 individual clans I can tell who is related to me. **Note that the people that are related to me are not blood line related. In my four clans I can identify my family members and calling them mom, dad, sister, brother, daughter, son, aunty, uncle, grandma, and grandpa. (It gets a little confusing if I explain that part but I am welling to explain it later, but for now I’ll leave it as simple as I can explain it). But for those who are not related to me by my clan group, it allows me to date or marry someone who is not related to me by clan. This is because in my culture it is wrong to marry someone within my clan group, it is like dating someone who is my family. I well give an example of my clan and my clan groups. AND to see other clan groups here is a website link that I use Navajo Clan System (http://www.members.tripod.com/~wulfspirit/navclans.html)

My clan groups for each of my four clans (The one that has ** are my clans):


CLAN RELATIONSHIP GROUP 2
Honaghaahnii        One-walks-around clan
(Original Clan) 
To'ahani         Near the water clan
Ta'neeszahnii         Tangle clan
Hashk'aa hadzohi         Yucca Fruit-Strung-Out-In-A-Line clan
**Nihoobaanii         Gray Streaked-Ends clan
Ts'ah yisk'idnii           Sage Brush Hill clan
**Dzi l t l'ahnii         Mountain cove clan
Dzi l na'oodi l nii         The turning mountain people clan







CLAN RELATIONSHIP GROUP 8                                             
To'aheedliinii        The Water Flow Together clan
Naakai dine'e        The Mexican clan
Nooda'i dine'e        The Ute clan
(Adopted clan)
**Keha'atiinii        The Foot Trains People clan
(Adopted clan)
CLAN RELATIONSHIP GROUP 9
Tsi'naajinii        Black Streak Wood People clan
Deeshchii'nii        Start of the Red Streak People clan
Kin l ichii'nii        Red House clan
Tl'izi lani        Many Goats
Tl'aashchi'I        The Red Bottom People clan
**Tsenabahitnii        Sleep Rock People clan
Shash dine'e/ Nashashi        The Bear People clan
( Adopted clan )
T'iisch'ebaanii        Gray Cottenwood Extending out clan



With the example that I have provided it explains who are related to me by groups. For instance: For my first clan which is The Foot Trains People Clan I would be related to The Water Flow Togther Clan, The Mexican Clan, and The Ute Clan. (So he/she would be my mom, dad, sister, brother, uncle, aunty, grandma, grandpa, daughter, and son. Depending on the order of introduction) AND I know that my clans are related to each other and I told you that it was wrong. But long story short my parents have asked their parents but they said no. (Messed up right, but it is all good at least I know now and I can prevent myself from doing that and I can carry on my tradition to my future kids.
The way I got my 4 clans are from my parents and my grandpas (one from my mom and one from my dad side). So, if I was to introduce my clan to someone I would say my mother clan, my father clan, my maternal clan, my paternal clan, and then after that I would say where I am from. But just to give an example I well use mine.

First clan (Mother Clan):         Keha'atiinii (The Foot Trains People clan)
Second clan (Father Clan):     Dzi l t l'ahnii (Mountain cove clan)
Third clan (Maternal Clan):     Nihoobaanii (Gray Streaked-Ends clan)
Fourth clan (Paternal Clan):    Tsenabahitnii (Sleep Rock People clan).
And this is the way I would introduce myself to someone and being able to find out who is related me.
If you have any questions/comments or you want me to go into more detail about my topic “clans” please let me know and I will be glad to explain and go into more detail. J thanks for reading and I hope you all have a wonderful and blessed day.



Monday, February 3, 2014

What my blog is about...

This is my very first blog ever and to be honest I have no idea what to talk about or what a blog does. But the only good example that i know how to do a blog is from that T.V. show call "Awkward" and a girl name Jenna writes about her experiences in her life.

ANYWAYS Hello my name is Rae, this is my very first blog ever and to be honest I have no idea what to talk about. But for sure it doesn't hurt to try something new, right? Well as a first time blogger I will be talking about my personal experience past and present and wisdom that i have gain, in which i well be writing this blog like how you would write into a journal. The type of experiences that I well talk about is love, sadness, madness, achievements, excitements, and any other type of emotion that occurs.

As for my blog i well try to update a post every week or two because I am a college student and therefore i well be busy. But I hope that my blog well help others or get advice from anyone, because in the end we are here to learn.

:) Rae....OH yeah before i forget please leave comments and other stuff haha ...Have a good day