Choices of love

Why have mix emotions? What are they good for? Why does it always happens?

These are the questions I think about when things goes wrong for me when I’m in a relationship or when an ex tries to come back into my life. The longest relationship I've ever been in was three years but within those three years a lot has happen. But unlike any other relationship they have their ups and downs, and sometimes it’s a huge curve that turns into a wave and never wants to stay a straight line. But within those three years I have experience a lot. I have experience what any man or woman would have experience in their past or present relationships, and that would be cheated on, being call bad names, being push away, getting yelled at for no reason, having arguments, not getting any support, being put down, and any other bad experience that can create a deep scare. A deep scare that well allow you not to have any self-confidence, being yourself around others, and having a hard time to trust someone (not matter how hard you tried). And then there are the good times when you feel loved or cared for but sometimes that can only last for a little bit and it well go out, even when you try to fix it. But for others that fix their relationship and everything is better than ever you and your significant other, are the luckiest. And for the people that got that faithful love-able person you are lucky to experience the gift of love and passion.

Then you have those moments when someone comes along and your ex comes in at the same time, and you end up fighting your feelings and making a big choice. But making that choice is something that you have to think about and it takes up a lot of your time. When I had to think about choosing between two people, I think about the ex-past history between me and him. Thinking about the history between me and my ex weren't so happy because we are so far apart because of school, repeated arguments, and too many chances I have given because I was scared to be alone. Then there were times that I felt like yelling as loud as I can or go for a long drive, but I realized that I am only human and nothing can change that. Things maybe rough but I have to go through this big challenge that has come up into my life. But now that I have grown up more I have made a choice on starting fresh and new because, from my point of view if there were too many break ups, arguments, stress, worried, and others bad things that have happen in the past, then it is time for you to move on even if it hurts. Moving on well not be easy but it’s a start, a brand new start to fixing yourself back up and rebuilding that confidence that makes you, YOU. It took me three years to figure this all out, I had my parents and friends telling me that I could do better and I should be with someone who is caring, faithful, shows respect, and now that I see what they were talking about I am able to understand because I’m tired of getting hurt in so many ways and now that I am moving forward, I’m rebuild my temple inside and out so I can be happy with my self and accept the person who I created.

In the end we all hope that we find our other half. But I hope that everyone finds love and hope, but if it pushes you back down, get back up and have faith in yourself because you are unique and you are beautiful or handsome. You have a lot of opportunities in your life that are happening, so take advantage of it while you’re here, don’t go out and rush things and hope for the best.

After all the questioning to myself about my past and present choices, I have figure out my own answers. So why have mix emotions, why they are good, and why does it happen…

Having mix emotions is something that tells you that you have a heart, a heart that wants to be treated good or bad but it is up to you to make that big choice on what you desire the most in life. And why is it good to have mix emotions, it is good because it’s an experience that you have gain and you are more aware on what’s going on in the next relationship and sometimes it is good to know what are mix emotions are so you can help a friend or someone close. It happens for a reason, a reason for it to happen or not happen, if the person is right for you or not. 

"The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched - they must be felt with the heart."
-Helen Kele